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“I just feel like people are quitting the marathon when they’re only a couple hundred yards from the finish line. And every person who quits makes it a little harder for those of us who are still running the race.” (Seth)
"I like waking up to the sunshine, instead of an alarm clock. The morning is inviting me into being."
Those are the words I told my husband this morning. I am still in bed feeling... feeling like I've been inviting into being. I just finished Part 2 and the trepidation I felt as I entered...
YES
has left me. I was not agnostic or atheist being ambushed by what Christianity was residual in me. I was encouraged in the space I was in, and even welcomed into something profound.
"In this light, Christianity looks very different to me. Instead of an old, mature, fully formed, maybe even worn-out religion, I see it as a religion still in its earliest infancy. And that raises a new question for me: If I leave the Christian community and conversation, will I be abandoning an infant, speaking in terms of deep evolutionary time?
I remind myself: the universe isn’t in a hurry by human standards. It has been unfolding and expanding, diversifying and beautifying in its current form for 13.7 billion years. I remind myself: if we compressed the universe’s whole existence into one year, our planet doesn’t even form until September 11. The first forms of life don’t emerge on Earth until around September 30, but no multi-cellular organisms evolve until December 14. The dinosaurs rule the earth from December 27 to 30, and the first humans don’t appear until December 31 at 11:39 p.m. Jesus comes on the scene at 11:59:56, which means that all of Christianity has existed for a mere four seconds. Four seconds!" BM
My biggest struggle in the last few years has been "What do I do with a 2000 year old narrative that I have no confidence in anymore. Well... What about a 13.7 billion year narrative. Is that any less of a challenge to embrace? Maybe, but my imagination can take me there. My imagination and wonder has more power to embrace billions of years of evolution... than two millennia of religious interpretation of on old collection of stories. Four seconds... Wow. That puts things into perspective for me.
"If we walk this path through immaturity, we will come to acknowledge that all our theological language (including the word God itself) is poetic. We use words to point to encounters and relationships that those words can never fully capture." BM
I have a list in my head of things in my head that I inherited from my Christian past that I don't need anymore. They are baggage and a hindrance on my journey. I was amazed to find that Brian has a list like mine.
" - No, I don’t need an evacuation-plan gospel that tells me this world is hopelessly sinking...
- No, I don’t need the Bible as an inerrant revelation of simplistic answers...
- No, I don’t need a comforting spirituality as a tranquilizer to calm my imagination and soothe me into compliant complacency...
- No, I don’t need prayers that reassure me that the future is pre-determined, God is in control, and God will fix everything...
- No, I don’t need sermons that interpret the Bible as the biblical literalists do, ignoring its literary depth..." BM
And the best of all... that one gem I am hoping isn't lost to me. That one picture that I really need to let go of and a new hope I long to embrace.
"No, I don’t need a Jesus whose job is to police the gates of heaven, keeping out all who don’t hold the correct beliefs. But I do need the Jesus whose life and message bring unique treasures to earth, treasures that I can share with people of every religion and no religion, just as I remain open to the unique treasures they offer me."BM
I don't feel alone this morning. I don't feel hopeless. I don't really feel changed, but I do feel aware of new possibilities and a new way of seeing life. I am still who I was, but maybe there is something better to dream of.
"It’s still not too late, if we dare to see, if we dare to believe, if we can relax our death grip on the past and reach forward into the future with eyes and hearts wide open...
That larger question—of the shape and goal of our life together, whether or not we identify as Christian—will frame Part III of this book." BM
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