The Gratitude Journey in "THANKS A THOUSAND" by A.J Jacobs

"In hopes of restoring my sanity in these troubling times, I recently undertook a quest: I pledged to thank every single person who had a role (however small) in making my morning cup of coffee possible. " (AJJ)

Okay... this book is actually a hard cover read that shares space on my office book shelf and no... it does not eat up data storage and megabytes on my iPhone.  I still have books that I can hold in my hand and every once in a while I might even pick up a read at the local Chapters/Indigo.  

This book caught my attention because of it's subtitle.  "A gratitude journey"  I was looking for a good gratitude read and I found one.  

"It's Tuesday morning, and I'm in the presence of one of the most mind-boggling accomplishments in human history... It is my morning cup of coffee."  (AJJ)

A.J Jacobs went on a journey... and I like reading about journeys.  Before we go any further... check out this Ted Talk link, and let A.J himself tell you about his gratitude journey.  

Gratitude is something I take for granted more than too often.  Saying thank-you can be so easy, yet I don't say it when I have a perfect opportunity.  A.J. Jacobs reminded me that there are thousands of people who work long and hard hours just so I can enjoy a simple thing... like a cup of coffee. Or in my case, it would be a large French Vanilla with a shot of expresso from Tim Hortons.  

"It's a challenge.  It's much easier to be grateful for a good thing (a raise at work, a delicious meal), than for the lack of a bad thing.  But both are important." (AJJ)

Let me try some gratitude.  I am thankful for Blogger for giving me an opportunity to blog about gratitude. I am thankful that I have fingers that can type my blog post.  I am thankful for my easy touch keyboard, so those fingers I have don't have to work so hard to type.  I am thankful for my typing classes (and the teachers that taught them) in Grade 10 and at Olds College, so drafting this blog post wouldn't take me all day to create.  I am thankful that I live in an age where keyboards and computers exist which allow me to share my writing inspirations.  I could go on... A.J talks about "the astounding interconnectedness" that happens when one starts being grateful.    

I am going to end this post with an interaction A.J. had with one of his "thankees"... Maybe it will encourage me again to express my gratitude to even the guys who builds pallets.  

I wrote down the name of one of the pallets I spotted at the warehouse.  It was made by a small New Jersey-based company called Jiminez Pallets.  I dial the number. 
"Is Rafael Jiminez there?" I ask
"Yes, that's me." He has a thick Latino accent.
"Oh, great.  I want to thank you." 
"For what?"
"I'm a writer, and I'm thanking everyone who helped make my cup of coffee a reality.  And your pallets carried my coffee.  So thank you." 
"No problem." he says.
His tone is flat.  I wonder if I'm being helpful or just intrusive.  
"Can I ask you something for real?  Do you appreciate getting thanked, or is it a waste of your time in the middle of your workday?" I say.  
Suddenly Rafael warms up. "You never ever waste my time."
"Oh, that's good to hear." 
"You are a very wonderful person.  I really appreciate you taking time to reach out and thank me." (AJJ and the pallet builder) 

Confession time with "THE HOPEFUL AGNOSTIC" by Donald E. Smith

"This book is the story of MY journey, of MY quest. I know that it will not, in any way, match or be a model for yours. If you find something of value in reading this book, I will be happy." DES

Is Easter Sunday a good day to admit something?  The only reason I found this book, was because I was googling "the hopeful agnostic" to see if it was used already.  That's right.  Welcome to my new label.  

I may have said a few times, that I don't like labels.  Labels are usually affixed by other people onto your own forehead.  But this time... I think I may have found a label that just might identify the current journey I am on.  

"I guess that it’s about time. I really need to decide what I am and what I think about God, religion, the after-life and where I fit into the grand scheme of things." DES

There was something very different about how I read this book. Because there was so much that resonated with me, I decided to add my own notes to the book.  I do most of my reading through Ibooks, so it gives me a chance to add notes to highlighted portions of the text.  It was my way of connecting with what Smith was writing and what I identified with.  

"Too many people , I think, just follow their family into the family church without thought or study." DES

My comments: For the most part that was me.  And what study I did do was not questioned.  I don't remember ever being invited to question the bible... until recently.  

"I find it difficult to believe that there is a heaven. I find it difficult to believe that there is an after-life where I will see, once again, my deceased family and friends." DES

My comment:  Heaven is not real to me. Earth is real.  I don't even have much hope for eternity, or at least the eternity preached at most pulpits.  

I talked to my dead loved ones as a way to grieve, but that doesn't mean I believe now that they were listening, it just means that I wanted to believe it in that moment.  And I pretended for the most part. 

"Why must I make it so difficult?  Why are there so many 'Whys?' " DES

My comment:  Because I want to be authentic.

I have to admit, doing this blog post and being upfront about this "hopeful agnostic" label, scares the "*&%$#*" out of me.  To be honest, I don't know how to have this conversation on the phone or in person with too many people.  Maybe I fear it will lead to a debate that I won't be able to defend.  Maybe I fear that I will walk away with one less friend.  Maybe I fear that I will scare myself back into a faith that isn't even inviting be back right now.  

 * * * 

I just took a moment to go to my front door window and catch the Easter sunrise.  I don't know what makes today's sunrise any more special than other days.  Maybe it is me trying to hang on to the remnants of a past significance of what today means to people who still have faith.  I don't know.  I don't know a lot things.  "I don't know"... the three words that seem to have become a creed for agnostics around the world.  It seems like we are lacking something.  Some sort of conviction to choose a side and stay there... or as Donald E. Smith says...

"I am a fence-sitter who can’t decide in who or what he believes. Fence-sitting is uncomfortable. It hurts. It makes me wishy-washy. As the Bible implies, it’s not good to be lukewarm. Tepid, that’s me." DES

So thank you, Donald E. Smith from Ohio... for pulling the truth out of the recesses of my troubled mind and giving me the courage to confess.  I am sorry that this has turned out to be more of a personal vomit session than a book report.  

I just got a text from my Mom:  

"Easter blessings.  He is risen"  (with a yellow heart emoji)  

I am happy for her.  She has faith.  I hope that my journey has had minimal damage to that faith.  This must be hard on her.  My journey has been hard on her... but she loves harder.  She listens to me when I tell her of my struggles.  I am sure she prays for me every day.  Jesus is real to her.  I am glad for that.  

"So, go say to those whom you love, “I love you.” So, go tell those whom you’ve harmed, “I’m sorry.” So, go do the things you’ve dreamt of doing and, if it doesn’t harm others, do them with no regrets or remorse." DES

Before I finish this post... I need to say a few things that impress me about Donald E.  Smith. 
*  He wrote this book in his early 80's (not his first or his last)
*  He is also a poet
*  He has been to as many countries in the world as I have had years on this planet. (52)
*  He was a high school principal (boy I have a lot of respect for that profession)
* He has been married over six times as long as I have. 

* * * 

What I like most about the "hopeful agnostic" label isn't the noun at the end, but the adjective.  Hope.  I keep telling people that Hope is the the lifeline I am so desperately hanging onto right now... and that seems to be the best thing I have in common with Dr. Donald E. Smith (PHD) 


"Am I still a child looking in wonderment at all of life’s mysteries? I hope so. I hope that I will never cease to wonder, to search and to hope." DES

"GOD CAN'T" - The book that messed me up and freed me up by Thomas Jay Oord.

 "The Las Vegas Strip was packed and buzzing. Nearly 20,000 people milled about the Route 91 Harvest Festival that October night, singing with country music star Jason Aldean, the festival’s final performer.    High above the crowd, a 64-year-old former auditor, Stephen Paddock, looked down from the Mandalay Bay Hotel. He visited Vegas often, living eighty miles northeast of the city, and casino hosts knew him by name. Placing “Do Not Disturb” signs on adjacent rooms, the ex-auditor moved to the windows of the hotel’s thirty-second floor, smashed them with a hammer, and began spraying bullets into the crowd below.In the next ten minutes, Paddock pulled the triggers of twenty guns and fired at least 1,100 rounds. Fifty-eight people died; 851 were injured. Thousands of survivors are still traumatized long after the deadliest mass shooting by an individual in the United States.

     Many asked questions in the aftermath. Where was God? Why didn’t God stop the shooting? And does it make sense to believe God cares for everyone?

      Many people think God had the power to prevent the Las Vegas shooting, its deaths, injuries, and resulting trauma. They think God could have warned officials, temporarily paralyzed the gunman, jammed the rifles, or redirected every bullet flying 400 yards. They assume God has the ability to do just about anything.

      After the shooting, some “explained” why God failed to stop the tragedy. “There’s a higher purpose in this,” they said. Others appealed to mystery: “We just can’t understand God’s ways.”

      The president of the Southern Baptist Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission, Russell Moore, captured the thoughts of many. “We do not know why God does not intervene and stop some tragedies when he does stop others,” said Moore. “What we do know, though, is that God stands against evil and violence. We know that God is present for those who are hurting.”

      Really?

     If God stands against evil and violence, why doesn’t God stop them? Does God’s desire to be “present for those who are hurting” trump God’s desire to protect? Does God allow death and injury because He’s needy, desperate for attention, or wanting to feel useful?

      Where is God in the midst of tragedy, abuse, and other evil?   "  TJO 

And to get the answer to that question... you need to read the book.  I guess coming across a book entitled "God Can't" will mess anyone up just trying to process those two words.  I know it did for me... but those two words invited me on a journey that I am glad I went on.  

"Personal tragedy and unnecessary suffering prompt us to seek beliefs more helpful than the ones we’ve been handed." TJO

I don't want this blog post to be a rehash of all the unhelpful theology I was taught in the past when it came to dealing with the ugliness of this world.  But Oord was right... it was tragedy that sent me looking for better answers than the ones I was given.  

It was the evening of the day that my nephew died.  Family and a few friends had gathered at the farm.  It was inevitable in the aftermath of such a tragedy, that some of those questions would surface.  I heard them that night.  The "Why's" and then the supposed justifications for the event.  No one actually admitted that night that the only justification for the event was the actions of the humans involved in the story.  Somehow, God had to be involved.  Even if the words weren't being spoken, they most likely were being thought.  It was the culture we all grew up in.  God was somehow responsible for what happened.  We had to hold him accountable for our pain and loss.  Because we all believed that "God can!" 

"In light of suffering, we ask challenging questions and seek believable answers. We want to make sense of evil, love, freedom, pain, randomness, healing ... and God.

We want to understand." TJO

It has been three years since the accident that took the life of one of the most precious people of my life.  The pain has dulled, the fog has cleared and there is an aching reminder of that day that resides in my memory.  My faith was shattered and is still not rebuilt in the way it used to be.  

"You and I aren’t the first to ask these questions. But the answers you’ll get in this book are different from what you’ve heard. It’s a safe bet, in fact, this book’s ideas will change you. You’ll think differently." TJO

And they did.  I don't want to share too much of those "answers" here.  This is a book of self-discovery.  It was a journey to help me through a painful time in my life.  It may have not given me all the answers I had hoped for, but it helped me to ask different questions, and that was the freeing process for me.  

If "God Can't":  if that much is true... then maybe the way to a relationship with the Creator or at least, a better understanding of the Creator, is to ditch the false expectations and illusions I have.  This book was a good start for that journey.  

"I wrote this book for you.

Our stories — yours and mine — matter. They portray the reality of our lived experience. We must face reality with clear-eyed honesty if we want to heal, love, and believe. Being honest about the past can open us to a better future." TJO