Finding Courage for Atheists in "WE OF LITTLE FAITH" by Kate Cohen

"When it hit me that I was responsible for teaching my children everything, I knew in that moment that I must do something about this. And for me, “this” was the mindless transmission of information that I actually believed to be false, and “something” was telling the truth⁠—to myself, to my kids, and, finally, to others." KC

Before I start into my breakdown of why I found this book so amazing, I want to admit to myself and whoever reads this blogpost that I currently identify as an Agnostic Atheist.  I go into further detail about that label in a recent post in my blog "My Agnostic Closet" entitled "101223 "Agnostic Atheist" A label that works for me"

I wrote that post during my read of this book.  Because of a challenge that Kate put forward to her readers in her chapter "Why I don't call myself an Agnostic."  I explain in that post why I still use the label Agnostic, and even after my read of Kate's book, the label will stay, but maybe I can have more courage with the Atheist part of the identifier. 

"Most of us have grown up with this reflexive deference to religion, and many of us continue to act on it even if we don’t ourselves believe in God. I still sometimes have to remind myself that it’s okay not to tiptoe around religion as if it were a soufflé that could collapse and then the dinner party will be ruined." KC

I wish I could go forward in my life and my relationships without feeling like I am tiptoeing around other people's faith expressions and religious practices.  I am not silent and I don't feel like I am pretending, but I do avoid the whole story with some friends and family.  (I may be out on my blogs... but most of my people don't come down this on-line rabbit trail with me.) 

"I am not willing to say “that’s just my opinion” about whether something is fact or fiction, right or wrong. All beliefs⁠—mine, theirs, Mike Pence’s⁠—are not equal. Many are wrong. Some are harmlessly wrong (I’ll go to heaven after I die), and some are harmfully wrong (gay people will go to hell after they die)." KC

I totally understand this, but I still struggle around the dividing line between what is harmlessly wrong and harmfully wrong.  Some things are obvious, but not all things are in my world. I know how to play the role of martyr in my circles; and I don't know how long that will work for me.  Just being painfully honest.  

And how harmless is the belief "I'll go to heaven after I die" when you get to spend eternity without your child that doesn't believe.  My sister Jennifer died this summer, and I can surmise that my mother heard a lot of comments from others, something like this. 

"Won't it be wonderful to see Jennifer in Heaven one day?' 

What goes through my mother's mind when she hears that now?  

"Yes, but what about Ruby?"  

There is nothing harmless about that.  

"Would I want to believe she still existed somewhere if she didn’t anymore? I guess, if I really thought I would see her again, I would. But mostly I would want her back. Want her back. Want her back. I would never not want her back, never not want to go back to the day before I lost her. I would only, maybe, years later, learn not to think about it as much." KC

That is right Kate, I want my sister back... here on Planet Earth.  Not in some cosmic utopia.  I need her here.  But my wants and needs aren't going to make that a reality, either here now or after I'm dead.  

"We want to love, to be loved, and to deserve love. For atheists, and even for believers, it hardly matters whether God is good or wants us to be good. What matters is that we know what’s bad⁠—inside, we know⁠—and we want to be good." KC

I have made myself clear for a while now that...

"Love Matters More". 

"Love is the energy that drives the universe." 

"Love drives out Fear."

I even can add that somewhere in that mix that Love helps us as humans find the line between good and bad.  Love is intrinsic in our nature.  At least that is my experience.  Something in my DNA needs me to support my people in order for me to keep existing well.  To jeopardize that doesn't make sense to me.  Thank you Kate for adding that.  Morals aren't found in the obedience of laws, they are in the core of a human to survive and thrive in this world.  Call it a basic survival strategy.  We need to be nice to people.  

"If you pretend to believe when you really don’t, you allow people to behave as if belief in the supernatural is universal. As if it’s not just the norm, but the only belief that is or should be normal." KC

The subtitle of Kate's book is "Why I Stopped Pretending to Believe (And Maybe You Should Too)"  Now I will be the first to admit, I don't like being "shoulded on".  I don't think after reading the book, that I came away with the conclusion that Kate is "shoulding on" me to out myself as an atheist.  She is so compassionate for those who don't have that easy of an option to do so.  But maybe for some of us who are almost out of the nest and just need a little encouragement to be honest... I think I found that here.  Maybe I found a little more self worth during this read.  I discovered once again that there are many ways up the mountain of life, and believing it is okay.  So thank you so much, Kate!  I am so glad to add your voice to my ever growing collection of inspirational reads and hope one day when I look back, I will treasure the "Rocket Ride" that this book has sent me on.  

"Of course, you can call yourself a humanist or an agnostic, you can call yourself lapsed or nonobserving or unaffiliated or “spiritual but not religious.” “Free thinker”⁠—fine. But if you don’t believe that there is a supernatural being in charge of the universe, then I strongly recommend that you call yourself an atheist, both to defang the word and to clarify the point." KC

Check out Kate's interviews: 

Seth Andrews: The Thinking Atheist

Hemant Mehta: The Friendly Atheist

Bart Campolo: Humanize me

What a way to end my book fast: "SURVIVING THE DEATH OF A SIBLING" BY T.J. Wray

"Often conscripted to the shadows in our time of sorrow, surviving siblings rarely feel they have the right to grieve beyond a few weeks. In a society that doesn't always encourage healthy mourning in general, we are indeed the forgotten bereaved." TJW

 My older sister Jennifer has kiboshed a lot of plans in my life... so why not this one.  I had every intention to not need reading for a year, and then she goes and dies on me.  

I found this book recommended on a Sibling Grief online support group I joined after Jennifer's accident.  How was I supposed to not take advantage of someone else's story?  That is what has been helping me on life's journey up until now.  

Each of us will react differently to the news of a brother's or a sister's death, and there's hardly a standard of behavior to which we must all subscribe. TJW

T.J mentioned that she had been looking for a book  when her brother died, and couldn't find one.  So she decided to write one herself, and invite other survivors of sibling loss to join her in her story.  This book is her story, mixed with other stories from people who have lost adult siblings.  

Feelings are not a choice; they are simply your own response to an event. TJW

Reading this book helped me to feel validated.  Hanging out with the stories of others who have lost siblings, gave me a community that was lacking for me.  I have had amazing support, but not the kind that I get in these stories and in the sibling support groups.

In dealing with the reactions of others, try, as much as you're able, to let people know what's helpful and what isn't. Avoid wasting your energy by becoming angry and bitter because you've been let down by people who claim to care. Just realize there are some people who will step up to the plate for you, and there are others who can't even enter the ballpark. TJW

This book was not only helpful as a guide with the loss of my sister, but there were so much great advice and wisdom for all areas of loss.  It would be a bummer if the only people who read this book are the survivors of sibling loss...because there is gold for every kind of loss within the pages.  

You are entitled to feel anger at the injustice of your brother's or sister's death, and feelings of anger connected to your sibling's death will probably surface every now and then for the rest of your life. My hope, however, is that you express your anger in healthy and appropriate ways that both validate your feelings and maintain your dignity. TJW

Anger has been my companion on this journey from the night I heard about her death.  

Most of us would like to believe that our siblings appear in our dreams by choice, to spend time with us or to deliver a special message. There is absolutely no reason to discount this possibility. No one, including the so-called experts, knows for certain just what, if anything, happens to us after we die. TJW

I liked the chapter on dreams, but not because of my sister.  The dreams have not come with her yet.  But I had significant dreams after my nephew died and it was refreshing to read her perspective on grief dreams and feel like those dreams were mine to embrace however I chose to embrace them. 

Many reasons for undeserved suffering have been put forth, such as the notion of suffering as a divine method of instruction—to teach us or others some valuable lesson—or the idea that our suffering is our just desserts, a punishment for some undefined human failing. But the bottom line is that none of these supposed reasons can be reconciled with the concept of an all-loving God. A God who loves us would not—could not—intentionally cause our suffering, for whatever divine reason. TJW

I think my favourite chapter was Chapter 9 on Faith, Religion and Spirituality.  It validated the biggest loss of my life and gave me space to understand a lot better my grief journey with my sister.  Maybe T.J. Wray still has some spirituality and faith, but she gave me space to navigate my loss without that being the forefront and foundation. 

 If you've had trouble with religion in the past, either with a particular church's teaching, an individual member of the clergy, or any other issue that caused you to part ways with a particular religion, then your brother's or sister's death may actually reopen old wounds. Quite often, for one reason or another, the religion in which we were raised seems inadequate or unacceptable as we grow into adulthood. TJW

My faith unraveled over years but came to a significant head last year when I "buried Jesus".  Losing Jennifer has inadvertently brought Jesus "back to life" in the words of others that can't understand how I can navigate my sister's death without a "living Jesus".  

And truth can be found not only in religion, but also in books, in our own experiences, and in stories and advice from others. Perhaps most important, the search for truth is essentially a search for meaning. Finding meaning in our loss enables us to incorporate it into our lives and to heal. TJW

I do want to extend my gratitude to T.J. Wray for sharing her story and so many others.  These words have been an oasis and comfort in a very messed up time.  I would recommend this book to anyone who has lost a sibling.. and even if you haven't but want to understand this kind of loss.  It's a great read.  And as I mentioned before... there are so much great wisdom in dealing with loss in general, that maybe it really doesn't matter what kind of loss you have experienced.  This book can help shed light on some very dark corners of grief.  

I've already mentioned that I'm not the same person I was before I lost my brother. I'm a little wiser, a little more compassionate, a little bit tougher. But I'm glad for these changes because they remind me of the journey that brought me to this place—this place of acceptance and, finally, peace. TJW

Banning books and a book fast?

 

The media has been fraught with stories of schools in the United States about the banning of books. I have not dived into the details as to why there is a medieval resurgence of purging certain reads from certain libraries.  I thought is was a given that the practice of banning books only serves to increase book sales and makes people want to read them more.  Some people making those decisions aren't doing their marketing research.  Book banning is the best marketing tool.  Look at Prince Harry's book "Spare".  It has become the biggest non-fiction best seller of all time.  The media has done so much to sour Prince Harry's story, but it sure helped his book sales. 

The very act of banning books communicates that books are transformative in the lives of children and adults.  What I don't understand is the mindset behind the action. It is 2023... why are people still trying to hide information from their children.  Most of the kids (and I'm not talking five year olds) have access to information that would make their parent's toenails curl.  Maybe the wisdom doesn't lie in restricting the information, maybe the wisdom lies in having conversations about what is out there.  Bring the books in the home and discuss them.  Ask your children what they think.  What a concept.  These are just my thoughts.  I'm not a parent.  I didn't have that journey.  But we live in very different times.  Controlling information is impossible now.  We need to have conversations and stay active in the lives of children.  Banning books isn't the answer.  Your children will find ways to read them and banning them makes the desire to read them even more powerful.  

* * *

I'm shifting gears.  Today I am starting a year long book fast.  I am doing a book ban in my own life.  Strange maybe after I just said that book bans only increase the desire to read... but maybe that is the very reason that I want to go on this book fast.  

Reading for me has been a lonely experience.  I have no one to share my amazing reads with, except this blog.  A computer program has become my best friend.  The people closest to me aren't interested in hearing about the books that have captivated my attention lately.  I want to  share my passions with my special people.  So when I find they aren't really interested in what I am passionate about... then it is time to find a passion that I can share with them.  I am not all that interested in lonely passions anymore.  

I love reading.  I have had so many great reads as you can see from this blog.  But my interest has waned as of late and I am wondering if the loneliness has taken over.  I start a book and know that if I finish it, the only one I can share it with is this blog and the four or five people that find their way here.  It worked for a while, but is is not sustaining me now.  

So I am laying down books for a year.  Maybe this time next year I might find a renewed passion and some reads that will draw me back into that space.  

Until then, I will keep puzzling.  I started a blog called "Puzzles with Stories" where I share some of my puzzles and the story behind them.  I still like stories and won't take a hiatus from finding great stories.  Puzzles have been offering me stories and I can share my love for puzzles with my people.  

I don't think my book fast will alienate me from my favourite authors.  Bart Ehrman and Pete Enns have great podcasts and I have been soaking so much more now in listening to people's voices.  

I will still continue to hang out with my "best friend" I call my blog.  I still get inspired to write poetry on occasion and I often share those on my poetry blog.  I often share Grief stories on my Grieving blog.  I have a week to go in my lent journey that I share in "Authentic Lent" , so I will never lack for writing and sharing space.  

I am hoping this journey finds me less lonely.  I can't say what books will mean for me in a years time.  Maybe this is just the start of something bigger than just a book fast.  I don't know.  Today, I get to say "until later".  But who knows how much later.  

Now at the end of this post, you might be waiting to hear me say "April Fools"... Sorry... not this morning.  I don't feel very foolish about this.  I only feel sadness and maybe hopeful.  

Maybe I will back here in a year... or maybe not.  Time will tell.  

Batter up! Here comes a "CURVE-BALL" by Peter Enns

Curve-ball subtitle: When Your Faith Takes Turns You Never Saw Coming (or, How I Stumbled and Tripped My Way to Finding a Bigger God

"I spent much of my life unknowingly abdicating the task of taking full responsibility for my faith. In my younger years, I largely accepted and absorbed the narrative of faith that had been written for me, thinking it to be my own." PE

Okay, confession time.  I'm a big Pete Enns fan.  But up until now, all the books I've read of his have been responsible for rearranging my cranium.  This book, isn't as much about the brain as it is about life.  Pete includes his story in his other books, but this one seems more from the heart of who his is, rather than from the brain of what he thinks.

"Rather than telling you how you should respond to your curveballs, I’d like to relate a bit of how I have responded to mine. I’ve had many experiences, utterly unscripted, that I could not ignore over the years and that have put me in a place to see God differently. I cannot tell you what steps you should take to move forward, but I would like to encourage you to become more aware of that inner voice telling you that adjustments are needed and not to feel broken or unfaithful about making those adjustments. I guarantee you are walking a common path." PE

One of my biggest struggles in my life journey has been feeling like my path in life matters and that I have the okay to walk it, just because it is my path.  I am grateful for every voice that adds to a kind of encouraged permission that I am okay. 

"Have you ever believed something to be absolutely true only to find that the truth is more complicated?" PE

I think it might be obvious from my other writings that I have a problem with the word truth.  I've admitted that that word holds a lot of baggage.  Thank you Pete for at least giving "truth" a deserving adjective like "complicated".  I don't think I could have found a better one. 

"The more flexible we are when it comes to reading the Bible, the more prepared we will be to adjust to the curveballs of life. The more inflexible we are, the less prepared we will be to make those adjustments precisely at the time when they will be needed to keep our faith alive and thriving." PE

My deconstruction and deconversion from Christianity is all about the curveballs.  Had I just been given pitches that send that ball right to my bat, I wouldn't be where I am now. 

I am thankful that I don't have to dance around the doctrines anymore for my own understanding, but that being said... I still face it in my family's expressions of belief and faith.  I wish I could easily dismiss it, but this week has proven that I can't.  

"And today, perhaps more than ever, all of us could use a vision of God that we cannot control and a faith that invites us to embrace the not-knowing that mystery demands. At least I know I do." PE

Pete doesn't have the same baggage about the word "God" that I do, but at least his picture isn't shrouded in a cover of Christianese.  He seems to understand Paul Tillich's picture "The Ground of Being".  So we are not far apart in the picture we have.  He is after all the author of "The Sin of Certainty" .

The death of stars is the foundation of biological life on our planet. Truly, “we are stardust, we are golden, we are billion-year-old carbon.” To be alive on Earth means something else had to die, and that which died was transformed into something new to make us us—and not just us, but every living thing. PE

I wish everyone could see the beauty in this idea... we are stardust.  I admire the stars.   I don't know much about them, but they inspire me.  They draw me into the unknown as a place of beauty and magnificence.  I don't need to know the details to be inspired by the poetry and wonder of it all.  Also.. it makes being fifty something not feel so old.  

"Evolution is incurably forward oriented. And this should bring us hope." PE

Thank you Pete Enns for more permission to embrace things like evolution, the Creator in my space and time, the unknown,  the wonder of it all.  It has helped me hit some of those curveballs that still come my way.  

"What if we are meant to live free from fear concerning God? There are plenty of other legitimate fears and sufferings we deal with in the course of our lives. What if God isn’t one of them? What if part of the gift of life, and of the advanced consciousness we have, is to become more and more aware of the Source of All Being, the divine Presence all around us, the Creator who is present in every atom and subatomic particle in all of creation?" PE 

The "SPARE" goes to War. by Prince Harry

He and I went round and round, and in my head I went back and forth, and by a process of elimination we landed on the Army. It made sense. It aligned with my desire to be outside the box, to disappear. The military would take me away from the prying eyes of the public and the press. But it also fitted with my hope of making a difference. PH

My first post on "Spare" didn't include my thoughts on the war stories that was a big part of the book.  I guess I didn't want to dive into my personal thoughts on that part of the journey through the book, because it was the hardest.  How do I sour my five star rating of the book by being honest about my feelings about war and some of the conclusions "Lieutenant Wales" came to. 

"You can’t kill people if you think of them as people. You can’t really harm people if you think of them as people. They were chess pieces removed from the board, Bads taken away before they could kill Goods. I’d been trained to “other-ize” them, trained well. On some level I recognized this learned detachment as problematic. But I also saw it as an unavoidable part of soldiering." PH

My hope when I pick up a memoir is to make every attempt at understanding the author. That is the reason I am reading the book.  I already said I need to lay aside all judgement and just let myself believe the author, because his story matters.  I want his story to matter, because then my story matters.  I can't pick and choose.  Either every story matters, or no story matters.  

War is a hard one for me to extend my compassion towards.  It is maybe the ugliest part of humanity.  In this soldier's own words, it is about the need to de-humanize the other.  I would do a great disservice to the book and it's author if I failed to mention a strong motivation for his choice to be a soldier. 

"I never forgot being in that TV room at Eton, the one with the blue doors, watching the Twin Towers melt as people leaped from the roofs and high windows. I never forgot the parents and spouses and children I met in New York, clutching photos of the moms and dads who’d been crushed or vaporized or burned alive. September 11 was vile, indelible, and all those responsible, along with their sympathizers and enablers, their allies and successors, were not just our enemies, but enemies of humanity." PH

"Enemies of humanity"... Again, a reminder that the targets were not human.  How can I separate the featherless bipeds dressed in the garb of the Taliban from the rest of the featherless bipeds we call humans?  If I do that, then all grace, compassion and love, for me,  is gone.  I have no other choice in my mind but to embrace everyone as human, even the ones capable of the worst ugliness the world has to offer.  

There is no conclusion for me here.  I want to see the humanity in every living soul, but maybe that is a foolish dream. 

 I honour and feel proud of my great uncle Don and his conscientious objection during WW2?  How then can I feel anything sympathetic to those who don't object, to those who chose to carry the guns?  I don't know.  Maybe all I can do is be sad for humanity that it requires this kind of behaviour.  

"Long after returning to base, I did a sort of mental scan. I’d been in combat before, I’d killed before, but this was my most direct contact with the enemy—ever. Other engagements felt more impersonal. This one was eyes on target, finger on trigger, fire away.

I asked myself how I felt.

Traumatized?

No.

Sad?

No.

Surprised?

No. Prepared in every way. Doing my job. What we’d trained for.

I asked myself if I was callous, perhaps desensitized. I asked myself if my non-reaction was connected to a long-standing ambivalence towards death.

I didn’t think so.

It was really just simple maths. These were bad people doing bad things to our guys. Doing bad things to the world."PH

Maybe my only recourse is to find compassion for those who believe there is no other recourse but to do what they do on a battlefield.  What it does allow me is the freedom to have compassion for other stories, like abortion, medical assistance in dying, refusing medical treatment and suicide.  Death is a part of all of our stories.  Maybe it's not that we die that hurts others as much as how and when we die.  There is no answer, easy or otherwise.  This is life and life ends in death.  Now I get to chose to lay aside the judgement and just hurt. That has to be the most human thing I can do.  

* * *  

Prince Harry walked behind the coffins of two women.  The second woman had lived a complete life, the first woman had not.  Maybe that is where my compassion starts.  

"When the funeral finally took place, Willy and I, barely exchanging a word, took our familiar places, set off on our familiar journey, behind yet another coffin draped in the Royal Standard, sitting atop another horse-pulled gun carriage. Same route, same sights—" PH

Every story matters... More than a "SPARE" by Prince Harry

"I looked up at the trees: You don’t know!

Harold…I honestly don’t.

I turned to Pa. He was gazing at me with an expression that said: Neither do I.

Wow, I thought. Maybe they really don’t.

Staggering. But maybe it was true.

And if they didn’t know why I’d left, maybe they just didn’t know me. At all.

And maybe they never really did.

And to be fair, maybe I didn’t either.

The thought made me feel colder, and terribly alone.

But it also fired me up. I thought: I have to tell them.

How can I tell them?

I can’t. It would take too long.

Besides, they’re clearly not in the right frame of mind to listen.

Not now, anyway. Not today.

And so:

Pa? Willy?

World?

Here you go."  PH

It can be a challenge, but when I read a memoir, I lay aside all conclusions and ideas about the surrounding facts of the story, and I chose to believe the author.  After all, it is their story, why not believe them?  I doubt that most who take on the challenge of a memoir would extend much effort into fictionalizing their own story.  I think it is the core of most humans to want to be known for who they really are.  Memoirs are a lot of work.  Writing is a lot of work.  It is easier to tell the truth.  

There may be a lot of squabble about this memoir, but I don't blame Prince Harry at all for putting his story out into the world.  He spent the majority of his years seeing others pass a less than accurate version of his story round the globe.  It's not that he is willingly choosing to betray his family; it seems the media has already done that.  So after the hell he experienced with the heartless media industry, he took his story back.  I can only commend him for doing that.  

"Being a Windsor meant working out which truths were timeless, and then banishing them from your mind. It meant absorbing the basic parameters of one’s identity, knowing by instinct who you were, which was forever a byproduct of who you weren’t." PH

As I read, I kept finding a kindred spirit in this second born son in the shadows of his family.  I found myself understanding the desire for identity.  Prince Harry's story is a magnified version, but still, I found myself feeling compassion for him.  I am a second born.  Identity is not easy to find when shadowed by the first.  

"My existence was just fun and games to these people. I wasn’t a human being to them. I wasn’t a fourteen-year-old boy hanging on by his fingernails. I was a cartoon character, a glove puppet to be manipulated and mocked for fun. So what if their fun made my already difficult days more difficult, made me a laughingstock before my schoolmates, not to mention the wider world? So what if they were torturing a child? All was justified because I was royal, and in their minds royal was synonymous with non-person. Centuries ago royal men and women were considered divine; now they were insects. What fun, to pluck their wings." PH

The most heart breaking part of reading this book, was the awareness of the cruelty of the media in Prince Harry's life.  I still can't comprehend the inhumane treatment that was displayed over and over again.  I remember vaguely when Diana died.  I don't remember where I was at that moment when I heard of her death, but I remember wondering at the senselessness of the accident.  Why the reckless driving?  Why the crazy pursuit of the paparazzi? Who was this woman that made other human beings act worse than rabid dogs?  I didn't understand then, and I don't understand now.  I don't understand the abuse of people just because they are celebrities.  Do these camera crazies  have nothing better to do with their lives?  Right now,  I am feeling very grateful for my insignificance. 

 "I wanted to hug her, though of course I didn’t. Out of the question. I never had done and couldn’t imagine any circumstance under which such an act might be sanctioned." PH

Another heart breaking realization for me was that there was a grandmother out there who didn't hug her grandchildren.  A grandmother that was loved by the world, but seemed to miss out of a simple act of love to the people closest to her.  As much as I have respect for who Queen Elizabeth II was and what she accomplished, I feel sorry for her that she missed out on her grandchildren's hugs.  Did any of them try to hug her and were discouraged?  Or were they just told that hugging the Queen was off limits, even if she was "Granny"?  Again... I am grateful for my insignificance and the insignificance of my family.  I was able to hug my grandparents and they were willing to hug me.  

"Why did they want to be famous? That was the thing I never understood. Because fame is the ultimate freedom? What a joke. Some kinds of fame provide extra freedom, maybe, I suppose, but royal fame was fancy captivity." PH

I wonder how many girls still grow up with the Disney fantasy that royalty is something to be desired.  Did Hollywood ever do us a favour by glamourizing that kind of fame?  I hope this story shines a better light on that illusion.  

"I'll forever support my Queen, my Commander in Chief, my Granny. Even after she’s gone. My problem has never been with the monarchy, nor the concept of monarchy. It’s been with the press and the sick relationship that’s evolved between it and the Palace. I love my Mother Country, and I love my family, and I always will. I just wish, at the second-darkest moment of my life, they’d both been there for me.

And I believe they’ll look back one day and wish they had too." PH

I am Canadian and I will still admit, I have a troubled relationship with the idea of the monarchy.  I don't totally understand the requirement for such an archaic institution in the twenty first century.  I am not a big fan of obligation, institutions, age old traditions, especially when they become more important than the people that are trying to keep them alive.  For me, people matter, not institutions.  But I am willing to put my wondering aside to embrace someone else's passion and story.  I commend Prince Harry for his loyalty to his extended family and country, but I am much more proud of him for his loyalty to his wife and children,  the truth, and his conscience.  

I usually say thank you to the authors when I do a blog post on the books they write.  But when there is no hope that the author will read my blog post, I wonder if I need to include my gratitude.  I am grateful for this read and will give it a five star rating.  If I could ever say a few words to the Duke of Sussex, it would be this.  

"I'm sorry for how the sick side of humanity has treated you. I wish you could have had a life like mine. Insignificance is much better on the human soul than fame, celebrity and royalty"  

"And to you, the reader: Thank you for wanting to know my story in my words. I am so grateful to be able to share it thus far." PH