I don't do audio books as a general practice. I don't like them for one big reason. I can't highlight quotes as I go through the book. I could harvest quotes but I would have to stop the recording, listen to the quote over and over again until I can manually write down the quote. I do that when I hear a good quote on Youtube... and it's somewhat painful.
I first came across Seth Andrews book "Deconverted" a while ago and wanted to download it into my Apple Books. The book version wasn't available... only the audio version. I passed it by because, like I said... I don't do audio.
I had taken a break from Deconversion stories because I had too much. I plunged myself back into my puzzles and binge watched "Reba" and "Little House on the Prairie". Maybe all the stories got too heavy for me. I needed a reprieve. Just recently, I started listening to The Atheist Experience and The Line again. I had shelved those as well, needing respite from the conflicts that those shows are so good at sharing. I found the inspiration to listen to stories again. So when this book came across my screen yesterday... I downloaded the audio version (still the only one available on my Apple Books). I spent Sunday listening to the whole book.
It is the first time a book drew laughter and heart wrenching tears in the same day. I took no notes, I just listened to Seth's story. There is no wonder that as Seth told me about his growing up years, that I started to resonate with the culture he talked about. The music influences were the same; the timeline was similar; his world seemed to resonate with my world. I just did a Google look up. I'm fourteen days older than Seth.
His story was different. His family was different. His American upbringing didn't really shadow my Northern Canadian childhood. However, a lot of the emotion felt familiar.
The tears came when Seth talked about Rich Mullens. I had never heard the story of how Rich had died, so that was a revelation to me. Had I heard the story over thirteen months ago, I don't know if the tears would have fallen as hard. It was thirteen months yesterday since my sister died in a horrific motorcycle accident. She was riding her bike on a Idaho mountain highway, and she drifted into the oncoming lane and was hit by a semi-truck head on. When I heard the story from my brother-in-law for the first time (who was on his own bike ahead of her at the time), he looked at me and said. "That's a movie you don't want to see." What I learned then was that the whole collision was recorded by the semi-truck's dash camera.
For the next year, I would replay that scene in my mind every time I saw the grill of a semi-truck on the highway. It was a movie I didn't see in person, but one I created in my mind... over and over again. So when I heard the story of Rick Mullens and his own impact with a truck... I felt that crash all over again. When Seth shared about Rich Mullens ministry, I thought about my sister's ministry. Rich was 41 when he died, my sister was 57. Both died too young and the sadness of that for me had nothing to do with the "ministry".
The big difference in our stories... Seth's and mine... I had already deconverted by the time of my sister's accident. It wasn't the family accident that was transformational in my slide away from Christianity. That honour belonged to my sister's 26 yr old first born son... six and half years earlier. It was his tragic accident that derailed me (and that is a whole other story).
I listened again to the "Awesome God" chapter this morning ( Rich Mullen's story). I cried again as I listened to the accident details. There were no seatbelts. The semi driver that my sister collided into wasn't wearing a seatbelt... and neither was my sister (motorbikes don't come equipped with those). Rich's accident was in Illinois, my sister's collision was in Idaho. Rich was a musician, my sister was a musician. I wondered how many times my sister led her church in singing "Awesome God". Did she know about Rich's last moments?
This book contains more gold than just one chapter... so I will listen to it again... and this time... I'll take notes. I really enjoyed the last chapter where Seth does a run down of the problem passages in the Bible. Most of that isn't news for me. It is great reference material. Maybe I need to get my hands on a hard copy sometime. I don't think I will need it anytime soon. I can't see myself being in a space right now where I will need those kind of bullets. But it's nice to know I have access to them.
Thanks to Seth's deep dive into the Bible... I don't have to do that myself. I think those days are over for me. I don't need to go there anymore. The Bible is one book that holds no more joy for me.
Thank you Seth for your story and including quotes from people around the world... even my province of origin (B.C.) has a place in your book. One quote stood out for me...
"We can have different opinions, but we can't have different facts." Benny from New York.
I really liked Richard Dawkins intro. I think he nailed it when he said...
"His is a great escape story. A light house beam for others." RD
"Deconverted" is so worth listening too over and over again... and I hope one day... it will be a great read. Thank you Seth.
P.S. I highlighted Seth Andrews in my Atheism for Lent journey this year. Check that post out here.