I call it Delayed Brain Syndrome. It's where you're asked a though-provoking question and you come up with a brilliant answer… the next day.
I was on the phone with my mom yesterday, and in the middle of a conversation on cancer she asks me,
“I wonder… what ends it?”
Since we lost her husband and my dad six years ago, our conversations have gone in this direction. What ends it? What's inside a terminal cancer patient that tells the body to shut down, to quit, to die?
Mom and I continued to talk about cancer cells, blood flow, air restriction… they all seemed to be lame replacements to the answer that I think my mom was looking for. I didn’t get the inspiration to Google the answer; I didn’t even pray about it. I just remembered and then I just let it go and went to sleep.
This morning it came to me. Three words. Maybe, in the busyness of my day, God was whispering...
"MAYBE IT’S MERCY."
That didn’t sound like God at first; my doubting kicked in. If it was God whispering it into my ear, He wouldn’t use the word “MAYBE”... or would He?
As I write this, my heart just became heavy. Last night , in our conversation, my mom and I were talking about a friend that was close to dying from cancer. My mom just phoned me at work with the news. Our friend passed away this morning.
Right now, there are three children, of one amazing man, that are feeling the pain that I felt six years ago. And there is a beautiful woman who is feeling the pain that my Mom felt six years ago.
"MAYBE IT’S MERCY."
If it was God whispering in my ear this morning, maybe it’s His way of reminding me that I don’t have to have all the answers. I can’t explain all the medical reasons why people die when others don’t. Cancer takes years for some and only months for others. Cancer takes some and some are left behind to breathe another day. I still don’t have the answers for that. It’s all one big MAYBE.
Maybe... just maybe, MERCY explains the unexplainable. When there are no answers, there is always MERCY. MERCY for a child of God to live another day or MERCY that takes that child home. MERCY isn’t always the end of pain, MERCY could mean more pain, but more time.
Today, I will remember MERCY'S moments. Will you remember them with me?